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Welcome To A Jackals Voice. The intention of this blog is to be an outlet for myself and others on topics that are not generally discussed...

Wednesday, 19 April 2017


Change is an unavoidable aspect of life. Whether we like it or not, eventually some things will have to change. Today's post is my opinion on how change effects me, as a person with Mental Health conditions and also as a stubborn fool.

Over the last few months, many things have changed for me. I used to work full time at a rather busy town bar. My employers were incredibly good friends of mine, as were the entire staff as far as I'm concerned. Going drinking was a weekly occurrence at the very least, I always enjoyed going out for a few and having a good dance, terrible as I am. I've gone from having a serious relationship to being single again, although in the long run I suppose this gives me an opportunity to focus on myself.
Whilst not all of these changes are terrible, I've found them hard to process at times.


My employers have moved away, having had enough of the Pub trade. Can't say I blame them, but I will miss them terribly. I can't count the amount of times I've had a bad day and just gone to their establishment for their company. Now they are not here, it just doesn't feel the same. Two people I used to see 5 or 6 days a week are now gone. We'll keep in contact, but I feel like my small bubble is starting to burst.

Drinking is not as easy as it once was. Granted this is more because I can't afford to go out than the fact I shouldn't really be drinking. the muscular spasms have made dancing impossible. As stupid as it sounds, this upsets me a great deal. Singing is also tricky, on account that I add extra words into the sounds every time I twitch. then again, it has yielded some pretty funny mash-ups.

For me, I've always been the person in charge of my changes. If I wanted to do something different, I would do it in my own time. The last few years have been filled with change, but only that which I was in control of. the moment I'm not in control, my anxiety flairs, my chest feels like it has been stabbed. I always try to 'roll' with change that I can't control, but I do find it physically uncomfortable. I'm not so stubborn that I will deny change completely, but I have to admit I do drag my feet. However, as I've mentioned above, there have been a fair few changes that have been out of my control.

Change is natural. It will always happen, and it always must. Without change nothing can ever get any better. Things just stagnate. As much as I don't like change, I'm feeling optimistic. My job, my health, my love life; all of it gets a fresh start. Admittedly the health is not something I can really work on just now, but everything else is fair game. As much as I detest change, once it has occurred, the only choice you have is to make the best of it. It's either that or become a grumpy old bugger talking about the good old days.

Over to you. Have you had any changes in your life that you found difficult to overcome? Are you going through any changes right now? Leave a comment below or feel free to message me at my E-mail, Facebook or Twitter. I hope to hear from you all soon.

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